Woodard Wednesday: Bulletproof coffee

A real conversation overheard:

Man: can I also trouble you for 4 packets of butter?
Barista: butter?  Did you say BUTTER?
Man: yes please, butter.
Barista: are you going to put it in your coffee?
Man: yes indeed! It's amazing.  So delicious and super healthy.
Barista: ..... (eyebrows rise slowly with a hint of asymmetry)
Man: ..... (smiles like an idiot and gives a cheerful nod)
Barista: ok then.  It's your heart attack

Ok, so I overheard this conversation because I was part of it.  I am no longer known publicly as the guy with a lot of tattoos.  I am quickly transitioning to the guy who puts butter in his coffee.

I'm comfortable with that.  Eventually I aspire to be the guy who puts butter on his tattoos, but that's for another blog.

So, why am I putting butter in my coffee?  Because it IS actually healthy.

I grew up in the 80's where we knew that fat was a bad thing for you and made you unhealthy.  Anything with fat would, well, make you fat.  The reasoning was sound.  I remember being super happy to discover that angel food cake was fat free.  You could literally eat as much as you liked and not get fat.  It was a genius plan.  What could go wrong?

I got fat.

Even better, we (meaning myself and Fabio) would spray this weird yellow stuff on our toast and exclaim about how happy we were that it wasn't real butter.  We delighted that this fat-free butter substitute was chemically designed to taste kind of like butter.  Never mind that it was full of carcinogens and God knows what.  It was tasty, and fat free!  Nailed it.

So what's the problem with a low fat diet?  Other than being super boring, it is not healthy.

I have been on The BulletProof Diet now for approaching a year and have to admit that this is the healthiest I have ever been.

Side note: I am not endorsed by BulletProof Diet or Dave Aspery and receive no monetary gain by writing this blog (although I am happy to change that...Dave?  Daaaaaaave?)

Side note number two: I am not intending to re-write this guys book.  He beat me to it and does a pretty swell job.

But can I just make this point: eating healthy fat is awfully good for you for several reasons, but here is my favorite.

Have you ever eaten brains?  Have you ever asked yourself why zombies go for the brains first?  It's because zombies have a highly refined palate and know that brains are the foie gras of the human.  What's the similarity between brains and goose liver from geese that are intentionally made obese?  Fat.

You heard that right.  Geese are fat too, just like me as a kid.  But you also heard that brains, and for that matter the majority of the nervous system, is made of fat.

Now, might I pose this question: if what you eat is intentionally low in fat, how does your nervous system grow and repair itself if it is made of fat?

This is your brain.  This is your brain on a low fat diet.  Any questions?

As for gaining weight while on a diet super high in fat: nope.  Sorry to disappoint, but I find it much easier to maintain a healthy weight on this diet than any other previously attempted.  And yes, I've tried them ALL.

It's worth checking out.  I am not saying you should put butter in your coffee if you think it's gross.  But if you think butter is gross, we probably can't be friends.  It's like saying bacon is gross.  Animal lover or not, some things are just delicious.

Happy to have a discussion on this.  What do you think of the Bulletproof Diet?

I can't drink WHAT?

Oh sweet burning nectar of the gods, why hast thou forsaken me?

People, I’ve got a problem.  I’m about to tell you what it is, but I need you to prepare yourself…it’s rather upsetting.

There is a running theory, backed by some moderately strong-leveled evidence that I may be allergic to, of all things, coffee.

Any Buddhists out there?  Perhaps you can tell me what I did in a past life to be dealt this stinging karmic blow?  Was I cruel to coffee farmers?  Was I a thief of all things caffeinated?  Was I Hitler?

It would seem that in this unfortunate turn of events, my body has decided to revolt in the form of reverting back to the painful teenage years of embarrassing breakouts of pimply unpleasantness.  With extensive efforts to figure out why this was happening, it was determined that coffee/caffeine might be the offending culprit.

It just so happens that my first race of the season is 4 weeks from this Sunday at which time I usually try to get off the juice to decrease my tolerance for the magical drug.  That way when I down a Red Bull during the race, I literally grow wings.

So that’s where I’m at.  Today was the last “cup” of coffee, but as you can see from the picture above, that was hardly worth calling a cup.  This coming from the guy who used to down 2-3 venti monsters daily just to get by.

Anyone heard of this?  Coffee allergy?  Where are my naturopaths out there???

Final Results of 45 day Paleo Challenge!

The scores and results are posted below, but if you've been reading these entries, there is not much of a cliffhanger here.  So instead of just blabbing the results, I thought it best to share a few recaps from some of the participants.

Just for reference, for the last 45 days we did our darndest to eliminate all grains, dairy, and legumes.  We also got extra credit points for exercise, stretching, taking fish oil, and sleeping.  Here were some of the comments for your reading pleasure, and New Years Resolution inspiration:

"frankly I feel like we cheated...especially when we made Paleo pizza one night. Ridiculously delicious! Didn't miss the cheese nor the traditional dough.  Though I haven't weighed myself, I'm seeing a physical change in the mirror. Not as doughy from day 1." -Nick

"This has been a great experience for me, and I thank Chad for setting up the challenge and all the rest of you for your inspiration and encouragement.  I, too, have more energy, sleep better, and am more aware of what eating healthfully means. Most importantly, I feel that the "Rules of the Challenge" became less like rules and morphed into tools for living well. Invaluable. Yeah, I did lose weight and my clothes fit better...but it's the combination of everything that has made me happier with myself." -Karn

"now that we know better, we are constantly reading the food labels, not only for us, but for our kids as well. Although the kids are not on a paleo diet, we try to make sure that they aren't eating high fructose corn syrup, added sugars and lots of other crap that is not needed in their diet.  We are both happy to have been doing this challenge. We have both bought into the idea that the Paleo diet is just better for you than what people typically eat. It was great doing it during the holidays because if we hadn't, there was never a lack of christmas cookies laying around for us to munch on." -Isabella

"The thing that has ended up the best for me out of this challenge is my outlook on food. Am I 100% paleo? No I am not. That being said, I am probably 75% better in my food choices than I was before.  On the physical side of things, I have lost 2 dress sizes and have received many comments on my slimming down. I just faced a Christmas weekend with my sisters and craved healthiness the whole time. Thank you Chad for encouraging us to take this adventure and thank you to everyone else for helping us each muddle through when we literally wanted to slap a small child for a cupcake!" -Jen

And how did our WINNER feel about the challenge?

"this might be the last night of the "challenge" but I have just begun my new healthy living. They say 21 times can form or break a habit. I feel I have formed a "habit" of healthy eating and exercise and want to continue. Every morning when I only have to take one blood pressure pill rather than two makes me happy. My goal is to stop taking them completely. I will continue to read labels, exercise and buy smaller clothes. I want to thank each and every one of you that were part of this challenge for all your encouragement, suggestions, ribbing and letting me be a part of your life for this wonderful 45 days.  Thank you all, especially my fantastic Coach Chad." -Trish (AKA: The Beast)

And here are the scores to report, but here's a hint: Trish (AKA: Beast Mom of this blog author) is the winner of 2 tickets to Cinderella on Broadway AND a $100 gift card to Whole Foods Market!  Boom, I say, BOOM!

And in second place for the overall challenge and winning a $50 gift card to Whole Foods Market is…me.  But that's boring, so I'm taking myself out of the running.  Therefore, congrats to Karn for ringing in an amazing 857 points in 45 days!  That's an average of just over 19 points (out of 20 max) per day.  Amazing work!

It was an honor share this challenge with such esteemed and brave friends.  Regardless of our scores and prizes, I truly feel that every person in this challenge got some degree of healthy living habits out of it and for that, I am supremely proud and thrilled.

Until our next challenge then, and for posterity sake, here are the final scores from a hard fought 45 days:

Overall Scores:

894	Trish
890	Chad
857	Karn D
829	Colby
800	Nick
736	Lisa
689	Amy
683	Isadora
642	Jen
640	Christina
611	Trae
601	John D
488	Kerry
138	Wendy

The final 30 days:

588	Trish
578	Chad
559	Karn D
554	Colby
510	Nick
475	Lisa
441	Isadora
435	Amy
425	Christina
395	Trae
349	Jen
347	John D
275	Kerry